From TIA Immigration

If we look back into our (Nepal’s) history, most of us will agree with the fact that non of us are that smug with the development of Nepal and what we have seen in last ten to 15 years or even more. I think, so far, we are not been able to hold on to our responsibility as a good Spartan citizen, and I think we are in delusion to be called one. Yes, of course, we have somehow been able to hold on to our duty and still rise in the adversaries, but that is so hidebound and the development has been limited to our own family. We have not been able to contribute to the extent we are supposed to have by this time.

Fifteen years is not a small period of time — it is a long duration. The reason why I am repeatedly mentioning this time is because as a Nepalese we have seen our country developing by leaps and bounds till that time. Booming of industrial sector, government sector, quality assurance and control, the grip of Transparency International Nepal on the offices and government as well as private officials had been so much commendable, and it had shown the productivity along with the extent of productivity and quality general public had experienced in the service and products. But, as the time passes we have seen it slipping out of our hand and so far nothing has been done to assure that it is not going out of our control.

It really hurts when you see thousands of Nepalese leaving for greener pasture, and no other place can be best which can reflect the real-time scenario other than Tribhuban International Airport (TIA). As I was checking-in in TIA for Bangkok, I was shunned to see the overwhelming number of people in the queue waiting patiently which was exclusively for the Nepalese who are destined for the gulf countries for work purpose, and those who are under working visa category. The milieu of the boarding-room appears as if there are 75% of Nepalese under that category and rest contains foreigners and Nepalese for some other purpose. I am not being judgmental here, but the fact is anybody can spot it correctly without hesitation — just from the countenance and the dressing sense of the people in the room.

We can now say with a dignified tone that we are one of those countries of the world which is contributing to a significant degree to the developed world for their further progressivity, and fortunately, this has also impacted immensely on our economic graph simultaneously, which shows it is rising just because of the foreign currencies entering into our country through remittance.

This is not just the case with the working class, it has been infectious to the intellectual class as well. I guess, there are more than 100,000 students pursuing foreign degrees all over the world ranging from A-level and Prophecy Certificate Level (PCL) level to PhD and post-doctorate. And, we don’t have to go farther to look for the example. Because, if I start to trace back my friends only from my high school to my college, I can find them dispersed in more than 20 different countries with the range of subjects from arts, humanity, commerce, science and medicine which I guess is quite jaw dropping in a sense. But, hang on, because this is not painting some rosy picture towards the Nepal’s future.

The reasons are innumerable, but I would still reiterate the fact which I have been sticking to for more than last 10 years and that is “political instability”. For me, it’s a backbone towards the progressivity. Until and unless this is sorted out in a conclusive manner, I think, doesn’t matter how hard we try, we are not going any further. But, then, this doesn’t mean that we are stagnant. Of course, we are going to make some advancement but that will be just iota of something we can achieve in just months and few years.

We all know that development of any country doesn’t just depend on the individual initiation and it is not under a particular person’s frame of control, but rather it is a group venture. We all have to cooperate with each other as we all have a common target to reach to. But, it seems as if it is taking too long to just even understand that we have a common agenda and we need to cooperate to each other for that common purpose. But, sadly enough, we are being hidebound in our attitude and we have stopped listening to each other and at the same time we have become myopic in our future vision.

The lack of cooperatively in our self is another factor that is dragging us out from our country. We have virtually lost our faith, trust and sense of respect for others in the run to reach a destination overnight — which is nothing more than a seer stupidity we are following.

There is difference between in doing something by your heart and something by force. Today, we are being materialistic and we are engaged in something by force rather than by our wit and our desire for it. Today, we feel like as if we are being pushed for something we don’t want to do and there where we fail to escalate to our limit. It’s always an urge to do something tangible. If we have an urge for something it will gives us with result that we long — because these days we have become result oriented rather than work oriented. Doesn’t matter how hard we try, if we can’t produce result, rest all is just futile.

For us to produce results, we need our togetherness which provides us with cooperative — something that we desperately need in this situation. What we have earned from Thailand is not just my degree but a value of togetherness and cooperative. Thai people believe in the slogan, “Together We Can Do It!”. I think, we need the same. Because, until and unless we don’t understand this, we are not moving forward and immigration will continue for ever. ■

Author can be reached at btrajesh@gmail.com

Our myopic vision, and hazy terminology

You know what?! The most hilarious thing I could ever hear about Nepal and such other countries which are clearly on total halt and stalemate in every sectors is still being called a developing country. I think either we are twisting the meaning of “developing country” or else we are on the verge of showing ourself something we don’t really deserve by using some ambiguous nonsense terms.

There is a proverb in our society, which says like this, “Aafno aang ko bhaisi nadekhne arkako aang ko jumra dekhne”. The meaning is: “Can’t spot a buffalo on your own back but can clearly see a louse on someone else’s.” The essence of this proverb is that we are becoming something we use to blame others for.

I think the definition of “developing country” has to be changed, and better be replaced with “under-developed-country”. I would better prefer being called a citizen of “under-developed-country” rather than being called a citizen of “developing country”. Don’t  you agree that it is embarrassing to be called something you are not? —  just like another Nepali proverb “jun goru ko singh chhaina tesko naam tikhe”. Meaning: “The name of bull is horny, who doesn’t have horns.”

If you want a clear definition about “developing country” you should better be travelling the world and see how other countries are doing or at least get updated on the internet, because after all “Professor Google” knows everything you need to know and he will direct you to the right information database.

Most saddening thing is that we are engaged in playing blame-game. Lower staff members are blaming their senior, seniors are blaming administration, administration, organization and offices are blaming government and government is blaming citizens. Either one way or another, it is finally dumping back on us. And, thus, finally we are not getting anywhere and of course not any time soon.

Honestly, we are boasting of something that we should not be for as long as a half-a-century or even more than a century old story and history. Gorkha this, Gorkha that………… Mount Everest, Nature, second largest country in the world in terms of water resources, “chaar jaat chhatis barna ko sajha phulbari”; meaning: “A common garden of 4 casts and 36 colors” which represents our entire community in Nepal – persons from all ethnical background, creed and cast. Gorkhas are long gone and they handed over their responsibility to us, and now see what we have done to their believes – we are still using their believes, their names as our poker chips. Are you still going to use those terms and names and play poker chips and do nothing? What do you think; how long this world is going to buy it like this?

Everything is lost, and if not now, it is going to be soon if things going on right now for over 15 years will not stop. There should be a big full stop now, or else better prepare for the evolution of new Nepal which will of course be a new Nepal, but no body says what kind of Nepal. We were so much elated for being converted from a monarchy state to republican state, but I think we jumped too much out of joy without putting too much attention on the meaning of new Nepal and what does that actually mean.

People say that, “Changes are for good”. Yes, of course! But, not all changes are good. And, if you think that all changes are for good, then I must say that you have a very myopic vision pertaining to things going on around you. Tell me a pessimist – might be!, which I am also not quite sure of because of the things I have seen in this last 10 or 15 years now.

Let me share a story with you about our conversation with friends when we were in bachelor. We are the second batch of “Biotechnology” graduates from Kathmandu University and also from Nepal. Most of our graduates and our seniors started this course with a vision – a vision that something is going to change in next 4 years down the line. Don’t’ get confused. When I say, “A clear vision” – it doesn’t mean getting a higher degree thereafter from a foreign university – that is not apparently a clear vision. A clear vision defines the fact that you are going to do in near future and how you are going to use your knowledge and skill you have gained. How are you going to get paid once you have spent what you already had?, and so on.

Once we were having some serious conversation, and I asked my friend, “What are we actually going to do after this?” And, one of them replied, “Don’t worry, something will changed after 4 years”. I think he was right to some extent because I am seeing some change. Still another hazy term just like “New Nepal” – change, but who knew this kind of change!

The fact is we are habituated to using some hazy terms and it has become part of our life. Advertently or inadvertently we are using it and now even our life has become hazy in a sense. Again, this is sounding pessimistic! Right?! We don’t have a clear cut answer to any questions in our life. In more polite sense, we have become diplomatic without having diplomatic or political background.

Our myopic vision is killing us and we are giving it a chance – not once, not twice, but it seems unceasing! It’s time to give it a break.

The Irony of Study-life

After a big break, finally, I got to write something on my blog today. Now, finally, it’s time to give this blogging a continuation that it deserves. The reason for this break was my final exam (masters thesis defense). So, basically, it is finally over after a long arduous journey of ups-and-downs.

I don’t know whether I enjoyed my study or not – I guess, not that much, at least during the whole study period. But, finally, when its over, I feel like I somehow enjoyed it. But, this vibe is coming just now – I had never experienced this kind of positive vibe since I started my lab, which was really pestering.

I don’t know how long people take to finish their masters degree, but I feel like I took longer than anyone; however, it is still average duration in Mahidol University, Thailand.

You know what? The biggest irony of study-life it feels as if it has been dumped on us as a curse, and thus the journey becomes even harder because it is always tainted with the negativity.

While I was student, I use to feel that rest of those who do not have study, they are more blessed than me, because at least they don’t have to worry for exam and for their grades. They just have work that they have to finish which can be negotiable in terms of deadline to finish every time they are assigned some task or even for their regular work. And, for that they are getting paid nicely. But, now, I have started to feel that it is other way round.

Life is not always a bed of roses neither does it is challenge. Its just some regular pattern which is filled with certain maze. We have to figure out the pattern and match it. The one who can understand the maze, they will pass the test or else they will lead to some weird path. However, there is always a route to come back to the normal way – after all, it’s a maze.

Every time we start something or given a task, we feel that it is the biggest and nothing can be bigger than this, but once we cross that stage, there comes a even tougher situation where you again have to get engaged in performing and solving the problem.

So, it is better to start thinking that what we have now to finish is easier than the one that is coming next!

 

My Life is an Open Book

Since our childhood we all have mustered some sorts of memories of our past in our brains – some are good, some are pleasant, some are bitter while some are just incognito. There are memories that help to live our life once again by recalling those wonderful moments of our past; we can go back and relieve virtually what we can’t in our real life. Everybody wants those kind of wonderful memories to fill their life. So, do I! And, I have one such story!

You know, there is a difference on how a child is brought up in a society or culture! Every place, country and society have their own set of rules which are imposed on the kids since they are born so that they would just follow the right course – which is in fact good in most cases. This is so intense in some cases that kids are forced to choose the streams which they are not really interested. But, this has, fortunately, changed over time.

This idea of imposing the family decision on kids were so intense and blunt that those families never use to see even feel the impending problem later in their kids life which were bigger and more intense than choosing the stream of their choice. The idea use to be taken so seriously and so cozily that it use to be something like normal; but students had failed in most cases. Because there is a sky-high difference on choosing something by will and something superficially.

The most difficult part of which is entering a grad school. This is not a cake-walk. This is something so serious that we have to think about it beforehand and have to prepare accordingly so that we might not get stumbled on our way. We all know that choosing a grad school and entering some school in lower secondary and secondary is not just the same.

I still remember the day; it was my first day in school. I was little bit scared and little bit excited – I was scared because, I didn’t know who will going to be my friends; how they will be behaving with me; whether or not I will be whipped by my class teacher or will I be put under strict punishments. But, at the same time, I was excited because of my newly sewed dress which was neat, tidy, revived – and there was a sense of pride in my brain: “Today I am also big; I am going to school; this is where I ever wanted to be (when I use to see kids going to school in their nicely trimmed hair, nails and polished shoe) – I had a sense of pride that today I am also looking the same as it appeared to me till few days ago; to those poor kids who still have to wait and watch till they will come up age to enter their first step in school! I was really proud of myself; though, vainglorious.

It never mattered how scared I was during my first few days is school, but I am still praised for being my mom’s only kid who never cried or complained going to school – I was the only one who never made the scene and never made them feel disgraced for being the only son and even that a spoiled-child.

Every single turns of my life had been a kind of exciting new event for me; though, they might have scared me a little bit, but my excitement to try something new never changed – I took turns, my life took turn, even my graduate school was not flawless – there has been certainly bumps, but my excitement to try something new, changing new place, new people, friends and new environment surpassed everything and it never veered – I feel, it had always been the way I wanted it to be – not perfect, but still something to feel good about when I want to relive those moments of my life. 

No matter what you choose to be, what you choose to pursue as your profession , where you go, whom you meet, how you lead your life and how bumpy your life had been before – always live your life as if it is never coming back again, live as if today is the day – who knows there will be no tomorrow! Don’t stop and settle because somebody is pulling your feet. Keep moving. This is your life and those moments of childhood and prank-adolescent is never coming back again; you childhood of those sweat drained clothes and collar, and drinking water with your dirty sleeves clinging, and dirt-ladened shoes – there are never coming back again.

Enjoy your life to your fullest.

Thank you, my dear friend!

Its been almost 28 years now of my life and now finally I find you. It was so great when I first got to know you and the value of your presence in my life. I am so obliged to you the way you have helped me and assisted me in my work in everyway since I got to know you. You are simply great to me!

Even though I knew you in the beginning I didn’t want to come closer to you, for being apprehensive of losing myself, because I always knew that your effect in me might be devastating in nature. I have always been skeptical of things in my life and for that very reason I have missed so much of good things, moments and persons in my life. Being apprehensive and skeptical to some extent is good, but as it is said that, “Excess of anything is bad” – it has applied exactly to me till now in few things – that is being skeptical of things.

Since you came to my life, your presence has truly changed me in everyway and more specifically the my potential to which I can reach. Whenever I had a bad mood, swollen and being skeptical of my own potential and doubting myself, you have helped me to calm down, hold my heart and be patient. You taught me a lesson of having a serene mind and its good effect on us, and our productivity and our gregarious nature and helping us to become even more social.

I can’t discount the fact that you are around me, because you have always been inside me. Once you are in me, I can’t help myself but just to surrender to you. Your presence in me is to grabbing, and I have always felt that no doubt when, where and how. You are just omnipresent for me in a way. I can find you in every nooks and corner of this earth. The only thing I have to care is that I have to miss you once somehow, and want your presence in my life wherever I am – you have always been there and you are always there.

When you are with me, around me or in me, I just feel so good and the world looks so beautiful to me. Everything looks so perfect that I feel that I have been moron of being unkind to somebody or being unfriendly to somebody. Everything and everyone just suddenly start looking so beautiful, kind and like a friend of mine. If you are not around me, I can’t really concentrate in my work, I can’t do things and most of the things start looking so hazy to comprehend and impossible to achieve.

I don’t know and don’t understand, how I have been able to live without you?, or its just that you are my habit now? I know, I will miss you so immensely if ever I have to leave you for some reason. I know it will be very hard for me – either I have to find someone like you or find an alternative to ward you off my head for a moment or completely – which I know will be truly painful and tearing.

During my time with you and trying to know more about you, I have seen how helpful you have been to others in your surrounding and not just me. You greatness is that you are just equal to everyone and everybody feels the same just like me – everybody feels that you are special to them, and not just me. And,I guess, I do not commit any crime longing for you and being with you for ever.

I don’t know what to say and how to thank you. I have just virtually no words in my dictionary to thank you. I am just dumfounded, astounded, and speechless to see how you have engrossed me completely in yourself. You have complete control over my mind, body and life!

Thank you, COFFEE!

“Marriage is a Private Affair”

“Marriage is a private affair” – this is a very well know topic and it has been matter of discussion and talk of table since long time. One reason might be that even the name of the topic is in itself very much sensational, and moreover, it has been one of the most crucial part of our life – MARRIAGE! Therefore, I thought of writing on this topic thinking of possibility of gravitating more thoughts, and subtopics which it will garner after this, for more discussion.

Before starting to write on this topic, I first tried to find some tangible facts that will help to bolster this topic, such as, the number of male and female in a country and a region, the issues governing female infanticide, the way of marriage in a particular country, religion, region and community, the average divorce rate (to clarify the fact that how successful a marriage is in today’s date), and how is it being taken in a particular society as a whole.

For me, what I understand as a meaning of this topic is that, marriage is a relationship which is more intimate, more secluded, more personal (in everyway), and is the closest relationship between two persons – if we talk about monogamy lawfully. However, polygamy is still prevalent and pervasive in most parts of the world which is still taken as lawful – not to be specific about the country or region, because in most cases it is justified depending on the momentary existing circumstances.

Since,  it is difficult to include every single details on this fact, it is wise to make it short and concise, and it is so flexible that it can be defined in several ways. And, I guess married are those who should be writing on this topic rather than a single person  like me, because they are more seasoned than people like me.

From the raw data what I can guess is that almost half of the Asian countries are still practicing the methods of arrange marriage which has been thought to be more successful compared to the love marriage – this is the crude raw data which might be different, and the exceptions are still there. This is a long past history and has been deep rooted mainly in the countries like India, Nepal, Bangladesh, Pakistan, SriLanka, African countries, Middle East Countries and pat of East Asia.

It is more a matter of discussion rather than information on facts because of the fact that whether arrange marriage is kind of marriage which is more successful and better than love marriage or is it another way round? Because, as the data from the various sources suggests that the divorce rate in the western countries are higher compared to the middle east and the Asian countries. And, more specifically, countries like India and Nepal has the divorce rate even lower than 1%. But, the story doesn’t ends here!

Though the divorce rate is lower in these countries and many other Asian countries like these, there is definitely higher suicide rate, depression and the killings of the newly-wed bride relating to the dowry issues which has deep rooted in these regions. However, since Indian and Nepal is more into the dowry system, still hazy or no data is found relating to the dowry-related-killings in Nepal. But, the sister organization of United Nation (UN) – UN WOMEN – data on India suggests that 24 women lose their life everyday because of the dowry issues.

The topic: “Marriage is a private affair” sounds even more meaningful to me in some particular cases relating to the violence against women when their years of shattered marriage life is still concealed to the world and never comes out until the suffering women is in her moribund.

The dowry exchange is illegal, but the law itself doesn’t seems taking out this problem. The problem is becoming more and more violent which is costing more and more lives everyday in these countries. So, just one part of the issue is not sufficient in describing the successful life after walking down the aisle, but it has got more devastating facts, that is more dire than the unsuccessful marriage, where divorce is more prevalent.

The Stifled Progress

I am not sure about the exact date and time, but it has certainly been more than 15-years and counting since we lost our old nice peace loving country and entered into a debacle of history of Nepal that we had never seen before. And, what was that for? For rebuilding Nepal, that was for making Nepal for everyone –- a dream country – or so called a “Kingdom of Heaven” – with a vision that we all will be treated equally, there would not be any kind of suppression and oppression against any minority group and community – in fact, to meet all the demands of the poor people of Nepal – a kind of ideal life with dignity.

More than 15-years have been passed and what we have got in return is: more suppression and oppression, more maim, more violence, more loss of life in the name of finding rights. The question is, “Is this what we had ever longed for?, Is this what we really deserve for being honest, humble and gracious, kind and peace loving?, Is this what we had ever dreamt of?”. The fact is we have lost of honesty, our composure, our humanity – whatever we ever had which we use to boast with – “The nation of peace – Nepal – has marred into a havoc where no one has control over what is going on. The only option left is to protect your life, your family’s life and your property you have.

Over 15000 people have lots their life, thousands got internally-displaced, and there is still no record of hundreds of those who are missing. Who is going to find those answers for our history? Really hard to believe that out of millions of son’s of Nepal, no one seems responsible to give it a final conclusion, no one is ready to stand for her and give it a pleasant ending. All those brave sons of Nepal which is known to be a honest sons of Nepal and is still being praised for being honest and unequivocal mettle (Gorkhali soldiers) are good for nothing, finally. What is the use of pontificating that we are the sons of great-gorkhas when we can’t even protect our own motherland?

The rising incidence of murder, extortion, kidnapping, rape doesn’t shows any sign of abating. No one seems responsible for what is going on. There is virtually no control over the system, the rules governing the system. We have been saying that, “We should not forget that we are all law-abiding-citizen”. Absolutely! But, what matters here and now is that it has just been confined to the papers and have ended up in some corner of the administrative office and control division that no body cares of even know that it still even exist.

More than 600 goons are sitting in our parliament and languishing in their cozy individual cubicles. That’s what they fought for! They showed us the dream of a heavenly state which turned out to be a hinterland. All those rebel forces of Maoists have same  rue to vent – “We trusted them (the Maoists political leaders) with our life, but we have been bilked – we never realized that the process of evolution takes time, nothing is going to change overnight, but we were so inane to even think about it.” Finally, what we got is this (Rs.200, 0000)!! All those PLA-fighters have the same question to ask, “Is this (Rs.200,000) is what we deserve from all this 15-years of insurgency? But, nobody seems to pay their heed to their plea.

The chances of recovery is very slim in case of Nepal as it has been infected with a deadly virus of ethnicity. Unfortunately, however we try to parry the inevitability and to get away from the reality, the truth is that we are going down under this quagmire of ethnicity. It has so deeply rooted itself within this one decade of time that it hardly seems to getting back to normalcy.  And, sadly enough, everyone of us seems stoic and stolid to this situation – with few exceptions that we have been continually been updating our Facebook and Twitter status showing how saddened we are and how desperately we need our normal life back in our home (Nepal) – which is insignificant and untouchable in any manner.

God bless Nepal and we Nepalese!

Our words

How ironical does it sounds when we say, “Words are insignificant, yet valuable”. With time everything has changed and we have ourself experience some motley of those changes in our life as well. Everything changes most and with unceasing pace, but the language, the words, the sentences and its uses. The words and the language that pops out of our mouth is so beautiful, yet so ugly – yet another sets of ironical thing.

It  takes years before there is an official change in the structure of a sentence or it take couple of years or yearly before a new word is added to the dictionary. So, now we can guess how significant it is when it comes to adding new vocabulary and sentence and structure in our language (irrespective of what language we speak). When it comes to adding it appears significant and more valuable, while it does really sound little bit quirky and insignificant thinking that something that has already been incorporated needs extensive amendments and approvals before it gets accepted – In this case, it sounds really insignificant to even think of changing or going after those sorts of things.

These simple, insignificant words that we use in our daily life might be insignificant to us mostly, but they hold greater meaning to our life in what we speak and how we materialize it in our personal life. Those are just simple words which are capable of bringing fortunes and misfortunes in our life. We, therefore, have to choose it very wisely and with astuteness.

Knowingly or unknowingly we are making mistakes upon mistakes and amassing them, but we hardly notice it by ourself unless somebody points it to us. Those are also our words which is taking nasty course of action because of what pops out of our mouth. But, we take it as for granted sometimes to appease ourself rather than feeling a sense of remorse for what we have done because of our words. Some of our words of excuses includes, “oh! common, we are friends, right?”, Oh! dear, we are family, you should not be minding these things”, Hey! we are classmates, everything is okay, don’t take it seriously”………… and the list goes on.

We should not just be concerned with our words, but in fact, should be solicitous. Our messages, our good wishes, our letters, emails, snail-mails, everything are nothing more than just words. This is what creates fear, anger, remorse, envy, love, caring and all sorts of feelings (either good or bad). One of my friend use to say, “People are different, so we should present ourself according to them and not what we are”.  Everybody is special and they wants to be treated special and for that reason we have to change ourself. Because the way we might be talking to somebody might be bringing them closer to us while at the same time from the same group it might be pushing somebody away from us. But, the problem is how can we use the words suited for everyone. That is the fact, and we can’t control it. Because there is saying, “I am responsible for what I speak, but not what you understand”. And, also, “If everybody loves us, there must be something wrong, because we can’t please everybody at the same time”.

It is our words which help us to get respect, honor, and value and it the words again which will put us in grave danger. Words might be insignificant for a moment for the speaker, because usually we speak and we forget. But the story never ends there! There might be somebody who might be taking it by heart, it might be someone who is getting offended and it might retain with them for years to come or even till their whole life. So, its better to find the right words than to find excuse.

Our words are something that defines us inside out. It just do not only define us but it covers our lineage, our society from where we belong and in the family where we have been brought up. It is our words which defines our family and not just us. We are representing our family more than we are representing ourself in any society when we keep on moving. 

Our choice of words might appear to us as excursive to us, but using those words we are just excursing ourself but we are still trying to put the person in track with whom we are dealing at that moment – which is more important.